I showed this list of dating rules to one of the Mathematics Education doctoral students, to which he suggested I add to this listing. Well, for one, I didn't think you could improve upon perfection (I mean, who can top that ring statement?); and two, you should write what you know, and my expertise does not lie with LOTR. (A fact that made my last coffee date go horribly, horribly awry.)
In any case, if I were to write a dating guide (Terri, you can stop snorting in laughter now) I would write it according to Pirates of the Caribbean. I mean, I've watched those movies about 700...I mean, five or six times, and as we all know with LOTRs, watching them more than once definitely takes a time commitment on your part. Like your entire Saturday.
So here are some rules to dating, according to pirates (and as with all rules--they're more like guidelines than actual rules.)
1) Timing is essential. Asking the love of your life to marry you while you're swordfighting a shipful of the enemy is probably not the optimal time to propose marriage.
2) There's nothing kinkier or more fun than handcuffing the bad boy pirate and having your wicked way with him--but make sure your goody two-shoes boyfriend doesn't catch you doing it.
3) No matter what gorgeous, well-adjusted, career-minded NICE guy you fall for--you'll always secretly wish he was a bit more like Captain Jack Sparrow.
4) If you want to have any chance among pirates in competing against their love for gold--you better not dress as a boy. You should probably dress in nothing.
5) If all else fails during an awkward situation, in which you cannot gracefully extricate yourself, fall off the side wall of a fort into the ocean below. Be sure to miss the rocks.
Can you think of any "guidelines" to dating a pirate?
9 comments:
6) Always be prepared with mouthwash strips in your purse.
7) If while taking a walk on a moonlit beach your pirate date suddenly looks extremely thin, run for your life.
8) Take advantage of everyone opportunity to get your pirate date wet. They look so good wet....and it helps with the smell.
9) Pirates travel with plenty of rope. Nuff said.
10) If your intention is to have a bit of "swabbing the plank" at the end of the night, do not choose POTC2 as your DVD of choice. (How freakin' long is this damn thing?!)
Wait, was POTC2 your movie of choice for disaster date night with Idiot Man?
Yep. No wonder he started snoring....*rolls eyes*
I should have seen all the signs and just gone home. LOL!
I think it was a 2 hours and 20 minute show...might have been 2 1/2 hours.
I'm pretty sure that bad boy hits 3 hours. Or maybe it just felt that way...LOL!
Do you like my rules? I want to see some dating rules from Harry Potter. Can you do that?
Ah... like Teri. My pirate must love bathing. Everyday!
Brushing your teeth is essential to going on a date. I love Jack but even in the movie, his teeth are completely "jacked up."
Can someone say -- mechanical pirate. All that bird poop, completely off putting.
This is more of a list of "demands" on the pirate.
Sorry, Hellion...didn't quite follow directions.
Pirates is Huge. They even have a segment on the Pirates of the Carribbean on HGTV. "How to design your home like a Pirate." It's true...go check it out.
I agree...I think a Harry Potter guide to dating would be great. One could be...
Always be careful with your wand, once it breaks it is dangerous to use.
*LOL* I love that one, Kasey...okay, when it comes closer to HP time, we'll have a HP Guide to Dating...that sounds hysterical...
Thanks, otherwise I suppose you could say:
Always be careful with your want, if broken there is a chance it could backfire.
July cannot come fast enough, with the new movie and book. I'm going to be so sad when it is over!
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