The End of Harry

J.K. Rowling’s last book about Harry Potter will come out on July 21st.

First, can I just say how excited I am? *pauses* No, I don’t think you really understand. I’m not just typical rabid fan excited. I am THE rabid fan. I dressed as Harry Potter for Halloween, and I’m over the age of 10. Boy, am I over the age of 10….

When I found the fifth movie was coming out this summer, I had to dial back my hope that the book would come too, because that would be like getting two Christmases in the same year, let alone the same month. Fortunately, my low expectations were trumped by this delightful piece of news.

*riverdances*

But now I have to worry about new things. This means in five months time (OMG, five months? That’s only like 150 days; that’s like only 21 weeks! *starts to riverdance again*) I will be reading the very last book about Harry Potter.

I have all sorts of questions and worries. Will Harry die? If Harry dies, will I handle it in a mature fashion and merely burn all my Harry books in my front yard in a fit of rage? Or will I become one of those horrible fans that writes the author and tells her she wrote it incorrectly? If I live though the ending—and by blessed miracle, he doesn’t die—what will I do when I realize there are no other Harry Potter books? What will I read? What will I do with my spare time? Actually write my own book? (Laughable, but as you will.) If he does live, will I run through the streets like a maniac, yelling, “I told Jack so! I told him he wouldn’t die!”—and if I do, will I be arrested? Who will bail me out? Not Jack.

Then once all my Harry worries and questions are extinguished and answered, it comes to my attention I will have to come up with a new obsession to bide my time. What will it be? The possibilities are too mind-boggling. I shall have to lunch on it.

Cheerio, and good luck, Harry.